Angel or Alien?

 This is a reprint of a story I wrote that appeared in last year's Chicken Soup for the Soul's Christmas anthology: 

“Mom! I made an angel for the top of our Christmas tree!” 

My five-year-old daughter exclaimed these words as she excitedly pulled the treasure she'd made in her kindergarten class from her backpack. Then she held it up for me to admire.

It consisted of a six-inch cardboard cone spray-painted gold, very much resembling a metallic gold, upside-down ice cream cone. To that base she had glued white pipe cleaners on the sides and bent them so that they came together in front. There they were also glued to a small rectangle paper so as to appear to be holding sheet music. In the back, she’d glued a lacy doily which I assumed were wings.

Up to that point is wasn’t so bad but its head looked like something out of a science fiction movie--a rather large white Styrofoam ball in which my sweet daughter had stuck large, colorful pins to make its facial features. She stuck the ones for eyes through small, round metallic gold papers. The papers were not glued down, and thus did not rest against the round Styrofoam ball. They sort of stuck out all around the pin eyeballs, looking a bit more like fins than eyes. This caused the angel’s eyes to look sort of like insect eyes.

It’s hair was a series of yellow pipe cleaners that had been cut short and individually stuck in the head. They were bent so they hung down rather than sticking straight out, thank goodness. It’s halo was another yellow pipe cleaner that had been stuck in the very top of the Styrofoam head and then bent into a circle around it. Since she had used the same pipe cleaners as the hair, it sort of looked like one piece of hair had gotten wind-blown and messed up. I had to fight the urge to smooth it down along with the other hair.

But my daughter was so proud! What’s a mother to do? 

Of course, I told her the strange-looking thing she held in her hand was beautiful and I climbed on a chair and placed it on the top of my tree.

… and there it remained, or was placed again, rather, year after year after year. It peered down on us Christmas after Christmas looking more like a space alien with its metallic, bulging eyes, than an angel. And every year, as I placed it on the tree, I tried to assess my daughter’s level of attachment to it, always hoping we could finally laugh at it and declare it for what it was—a five-year-old’s funny attempt at making an angel. But each year my daughter smiled and admired it when it came out of the Christmas box. Many times, she excitedly placed it in my hand and exclaimed, “My angel! Here Mommy, put her on top of the tree.” (I suppose the angel was a her. It was hard to tell but my daughter seemed to think it was.)

One of the years when my daughter was in middle school, as I was taking the angel out of the box of decorations, its head fell off and rolled onto the family room floor. I jumped at the opportunity, quickly suggesting that perhaps it was time to get a new angel for our tree.

My daughter’s face fell. Even though she was close to being a teenager, she still held affection for this strange item that bordered on being a monstrosity. “Or… I could try gluing the head back on and see if it stays,” I quickly suggested. This pleased my daughter so her angel once again graced our tree … for many more years.

I was beginning to wonder if I would have to have that bug-eyed thing topping my tree forever! I would see beautiful trees in stores and magazines and other people’s houses, but not mine. Mine was forever doomed to be a tree decorated with homemade ornaments my three sons and one daughter had brought home to me through the years. And it would forever have this insect-like alien with messed up hair sitting on top of it!

I resigned myself to it. It appeared inevitable.

Then one Christmas morning when my daughter was in high school, she handed me the gift she had bought me. I opened it and there before my eyes was a beautiful, elegant, store-bought angel tree-topper! I have never been so happy to receive a gift in my life! She and the whole family burst out laughing when they saw how happy I was.

Today, my tree is a mix of homemade ornaments and purchased ones. But sitting on the very top is a lovely angel holding tiny candles that light up who has normal looking hair and eyes and an elegant halo. It looks down at us in a gentle, smiling sort of way, instead of leering at us through bulging eyes.

And the other, much loved angel of days gone by rests in the bottom of the decoration box in two parts—body and head—because her head came off again. Every year I look at it and laugh … but I think I miss it a little. I love her too much to throw her away. She is a treasure in her own way.

My daughter is grown now with a child of her own. One year, I offered to glue her angel’s head back on and let her use it or her Christmas tree. We both burst out laughing.
 

 Christmas Card Christmas Christmas Tree Advent

 Christmas Card Christmas Christmas Tree Advent